Dick Army in Full Frontal Assault on Krotch Brothers

Chelsea Hotel (MP) - In an unexpected move for control of disinformation Chuckles and Davo Krotch, better known as the Krotch Brothers from their vaudeville days, are attempting to take over the Kato Kaelin Institute. Part of the institute is Goebbles FreedomWorks, a fixed markets for the rich/limited government for the people advocacy group.

Goebbles FreedomWorks has enlisted the help of Dick Army, the latest name iteration for the private mercenary company formerly known as Blackwater Worldwide, Xe Services, Academi, and Heavily Armed Assholes Ready to Shit on Your Parade Corporation.

Chuckles and Davo Krotch

A statement from Goebbles FreedomWorks delivered by Dick Army to Krotch Industries and Clownworks said, "As representatives of Goebbles FreedomWorks, a grassroots organization that fights for constitutionally-limited government for the people and individual freedom as defined by our propaganda, we have grave concerns regarding the potential damage to the Gauze of Liberty that will result from the dispute that has erupted between the Board of Directors of the Kato Kaelin Institute and various parties at Krotch Industries and Clownworks."

The Gauze of Liberty referred to in  the statement is a counter intelligence program (COINTELPRO) designed by Dick Army that protects the people from "truth terrorists" by limiting their access to "unpatriotic knowledge."




LINKS:
Huffingtonpost: Koch Brothers Cato Institute Takeover

Beck Commands Lobotomites to Declare War on Human Progress

"Mr. Beck needs to stuff this language back where it came from," DonJon.

Chelsea Hotel (MP) - Glenn "LobotoMary" Beck has commanded the Lobotomites to start a war on Human Progress.  The Lobotomites are Beck's lobotomized hoard of worshipful followers.  Beck commands the Lobotomites from his bunker at Foxy Newsy "hows that working out for ya" Network.

Foxy Newsy is owned by Lord Rupert "Long Heaps" Murdoch.  In an effort to control the Mis-information Industry, Murdoch invested in technology to perform surgical lobotomies via cable.  The procedure is technically termed a Media-Delivered Surgical Lobotomy, referred to in the Mis-Information Industry as a Media-botomy.  

Beck creates his ideas each morning by, "pounding his head and vomiting for four hours."  He claims the ritual connects him to his higher self, "I once used Everclear to find enlightenment, now I can induce it on command."   

He pronounced at the Conservative Fucked Up Dead Genetic Enders Political Action Committee (CFUDGE-PAC) Conference that, "Progressives are a disease."  The CFUDGE-PACers and Lobotomites yelped with delight when Beck brought out his Magic Chalkboard and commanded them to, "bleed the disease from their veins."  Apparently, conservative medicine has not progressed beyond Therapeutic Phlebotomy (bloodletting).

A Statement released by DonJonVonavich, Eccentric Publisher of Moloch the Plutocracy, offers, "History is ripe with those that think progress is the enemy of Human Being.  This opinion has merit in civil discourse, but this is not discourse and certainly not civil.  Mr. Beck needs to stuff this language back where it came from." 

NOTES:

1. Crooks and Liars - http://crooksandliars.com/david-neiwert/glenn-becks-eliminationist-attacks-p
2. Houston Examiner - Glen Beck says progressives must be eradicated 
3. Alternet - Is Glen Beck Breeding Domestic Violence?