Tuesday, August 23, 2016

TRUMPeror Funds Play-Do$h Foundation for the Poors!

TRUMPeror
Funds Play-Do$h
Foundation for the Poors!


Trump Play-Do$h used to “Rebuild Homes,
Lives, and Feed the Poors.”


DonJon 2016 Campaign Responds


By, ROger TurgiD, MO editor.


In Memoriam — Harry Martin



Chelsea Hotel (MP) TRUMPeror Swooptopian has announced a new charitable foundation to support the needs of the “Poors.” The TRUMP Play-Do$h Foundation was established in coordination with Hasbro Corporation to develop a branded Play-Doh product that can be used as currency, food, and building materials.


Katrina Pierson, the spokesperson for the foundation stated, “By putting the TRUMP name on the traditional children's modeling clay, we’ve created a currency of greater value than the ‘lame brain damaged' American Dollar. Unlike Federal Reserve Notes, TRUMP Play-Do$h is non-toxic, non-irritating & non-allergenic to white people and Mr. Trumps’ African-American.”

TRUMP Play-Do$h is a fiat currency backed by the Bank of China and redeemable at Goldman Sachs affiliated banks everywhere for .94764783 Sub-2008 Mortgage Backed Securities (Sub2008s), Beanie Babies, or TRUMP ‘pre-grown’ Chia Pets.


Wednesday, August 17, 2016

tWAaaaaat?
TRUMP!
TRUMPeror?”


Mysterious DonJon tWAt Decimates Twitterverse

DonJon 2016 Presidential Bid Uncertain


By, Roger Turgid, MO editor.

In Memoriam — Harry Martini


Chelsea Hotel (MP) The 2016 American Presidential campaign is in full backswing, and DonJonVonavich, Eccentric Publisher of Moloch the Plutocracy, has yet to announce. After his defeat in 2012, DonJon retreated to the Multiverse to resume his cross-dimensional quest for “the singularity, the unknowable, and MO!”

Today DonJon broke his silence with a single mysterious tweet surfacing from his twitter account, @modonjon.


In 2008 and 2012 DonJon ran for President of the United States America, or as he prefers to call it, “the Slimmest Office in the Land.” DonJon was expected to run in 2016, but the tweet brings into question his whereabouts. He was last known to be in the 7TH Dimension of the Multiverse, or the Egoverse as the Higgs-boson media refers to it.

DonJon’s former Chelsea “comrade” and inter-dimensional doppelganger, Kyle, proffered this statement, “If DonJon never enters the 3RD again, it’ll be too damn soon.” Kyle has traditionally and “unwillingly” given up his seat in the 3RD Dimension for DonJon’s presidential campaign.
The cryptic tweet is being analyzed by InterDimensional Twitter Experts (ITwit) for translation, authentication, and tweet of origin.

BREAKING NEWS: DonJon tweet a tWAt!


InterDimensional Twitter Experts (ITwit) announced their initial findings on the mysterious tweet from DonJon. They report, with 92.6% certainty, the tweet was actually a “dead man’s tWAt” from the 7TH Dimension. ITwit explains, “a dead man’s tWAt is the alert switch on a Lorentzian traversable wormhole that releases red-alert warnings when an Interdimensional traveler is forced from one dimension to another.”


“A study of the chemtrails left by the tWAt led from the 7TH back to the 2ND Dimension,” claims ITwit experts, “it appears he was ejected from the Egoverse by the ruling Egos.” They further confirmed that DonJon is somewhere in the Chelsea Hotel in 2-dimensional form.


The ITwit findings throw into question his appearance in the 3RD Dimension during the 2016 Presidential Campaign season. InterDimensional political analyst, Roger TuRgid claimed, “DonJon cannot run from the 2ND without a 3RD Dimensional doppleganger. It’s basic inter-dimensional politics.”
MO!

DonJon 2016 Campaign Diary


POST #1: 10:12:56:pt Ivanka 21, 1BTE


A TRUMPire Declared.


He walked a slow consenting cadence and politely applauded his perfect heir apparent, after a two-cheek air-kiss, with her willing obedience he commanded her hips front-and-square and gave her a gentle patriarchal pat, above, in a towering gilt tsarist-bold font was his five letter name —TRUMP— cowering below was a crowded row of desperate and defeated american flags standing in conscription to the Advancing TRUMPire, the TRUMPeror declared, “I alone can TRUMP it.”


A spray-tanned-fair-haired-man-clown-child branded the party of “Honest” Abe Lincoln his today. The old-guard cast aside, replaced by a praetorian gaggle of imperious lieutenants, shifty-tongued surrogates, and pig-shit-nervous coat-tail politicians, he “humbly” declared TRiUMPh over the right~O~wing of the American two-party Plutocracy.


“Such was the beginning of the Billion Year TRUMPire,”  DonJon.



Stay tuned for more of DonJon's 2016 Campaign Diary

Tuesday, August 16, 2016

DonJon 2016 Campaign Diary - Post #2

DonJon 2016 Campaign Diary

Post #2: 10:12:56:pt Ivanka 21, 1BTE

“The combover is cast, believe me.” dRUMPfus, June 16, 2015.

On June 16, 2015, NarCissus Germanicus dRUMPfus descended the gilt-n-orange Republicon escalator and declared his intention to pursue conquest over the American Plutocracy and return the Republic to “the real Americans.”

“From that day, with swift and certain mendacious incivility, he chased the Legions of Priebus right, left, south, north, west and east to a final and bitter end at the Battle of Clevelandia.” Hannityus, Imperial Historian of the 1ST TRUMPian TRUMPire.

At the Republican National Convention, in seventy-four fear-heaving minutes, TRUMP spewed 5,157 words of shrill pursed-lipped tele-prompted TRUMPoratory that ended “Morning in America” and brought forth a new “House Divided.” America was no longer a “shining city on a hill,” rather, one would surmise, “a steaming turd in a dumpster fire” that only TRUMP alone could put out.

Declaring himself TRUMPeror TheDonaldCaesar NarcissusAmericanus Swooptopian, dRUMPfus rode TRiUMPhant out of the Quicken, Give-Me-Your-Fucking-Cash Colosseum, wearing a golden combover of diamond encrusted laurel (fake Harry Winston, of course), and the TRiUMPhal Angelo Donghia purple and gold embossed Louis the XIV toga picta.

“Mistake the clown for the crown at your peril.” DonJon.


trumpacus stage.jpg

Following in frothing fomenting formation toward the inevitable conquest of the American Plutocracy:

Legio tertia decima Alba Racistia, the 13th Old White Racist Legion: A plebiscite of obedient helmet-headed-gun-sucking white-angry militiamen determined to “take back the country” for themselves.
Following safely in tow were the Legio Primo Hypocritae quia Jesus, The First Hypocrites for Jesus Legion, or the JesieCrites as they are known  in the higgs-boson-media.

along with a

fawning host of bourgeoisie TRUMPerterians marching in step to the Weimar Republic Marching Band.  


Coming Next- The Plutocracy Defended



Buy Episode One of Greatest Series to Come out of the Multiverse