Monday, June 28, 2010

Congress Enacts National Pee-in-a-Cup Day

"I fear the rise of a Urinary-Industrial Complex,"  DonJon.

Chelsea Hotel (MP) - The United States Congress has enacted National Pee-in-a-Cup-Day to be observed every July 3rd.  "The day before the greatest declaration of Independence for Human Being is a perfect time for patriots to offer their posterity," declared Speaker of the House, Harry "Mumbling Idiot" Reed.  The President "Hopie" Obama, has concurred, "the urine of this Great Nation provides hope for the afterbirth of all future patriots."

National P-in-a-Cup-Day will offer all Americans free entrance to any national, state, or local park, public building and facility, and participating corporate sponsor lobby to urinate freely in portable toilets provided by the newly formed Department of Urination, which reports to the Department of Homeland Security.

President Obama has announced that former Vice President, Dick "Luke, I am your father" Cheney, will be appointed Secretary of Urination.  "As a former bladder compromised Congressman and Chairman of Porta-Potty, Inc., I have the rare combination of public and private urinary experience," claimed Cheney.  Cheney has already held an informal private meeting concerning urinary policy with the Captains of the Urination Industry, but has refused to release the attendants of the meeting to the press.

Undisclosed sources have told Moloch the Plutocracy that the Chairmans of Porta-Potty, Paorta-John & JaneJohnny On The Spot, Port-O-Let, and Toi-Toi were present at the meeting.  There have been rumblings about Cheney's exclusion of  Port-a-LooTidy John, and John To Go from the meetings considering the inclusion of Chinese Urinary Industry leader, Toi-Toi.

In a related annoucement, Publicist to DonJonVonavich HRH King of the MOs, Harry Martini, founder of Handled Messiahs PR, offered DonJon's reaction, "This will 'piss off' many American patriots... I fear the rise of a Urinary-Industrial Complex."


It is uncertain how these developments will effect DonJon's MoBoho RoadShow - The MoBeg'n Tour.  Cheney has offered to contribute a Department of Urination approved Porta-Potty for the MoBus.



NOTES:

Examiner.com: Republicans block unemployment benefits extension for lazy drug addicted breeding hobos




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